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Writer's pictureThe_Secret_Bookreview

What Remains? Life, Death and the Human Art of Undertaking ⚰️


What Remains? is a bold, heartfelt reimagining of how we approach death and grief. Callender breaks away from the rigid traditions of the British funeral industry, crafting deeply personal, unconventional ceremonies that honour the individuality of both the deceased and their loved ones.


Callender’s ethos is simple yet profound: death, though inevitable, need not be steeped in Victorian formality.


By founding the Green Funeral Company in Devon, he introduced a DIY, deeply personal approach to grief and farewell. From carrying coffins across windswept beaches to hosting pub wakes with caskets on sticky tables, his methods are unconventional but rooted in compassion. Each ceremony is tailored to the family’s wishes, however eccentric, allowing mourners to say goodbye in a way that truly honours the life of their loved one.


The book is filled with vivid, sometimes startling anecdotes. Flaming arrows, occult rituals, and even the People's Pyramid built from “bony bricks” all make an appearance. Yet, beneath the aesthetic lies a deeply human story—one of unresolved grief, personal loss, and the transformative power of facing death head-on.


Callender’s reflections on his parents’ passing and his connection to cultural and social outsiders lend an intimate depth to the narrative, making it as much about living authentically as it is about dying with dignity.


What stands out most is Callender’s sensitivity. He writes with care, not only for the bereaved but for the dead themselves, including those who were less than loved in life. He doesn’t shy away from the uncomfortable truths of death, yet his tone is never morbid. Instead, his words radiate an affirming warmth, reassuring readers that even in our darkest moments, love and courage endure.


As a nurse with experience in emergency, palliative, and neonatal care, I have witnessed death in many forms—from sudden loss to peaceful goodbyes. In each setting, I've supported individuals and families through the profound emotions that accompany dying. However, despite my extensive experience, I’m always seeking new knowledge and approaches to care.


Far from being morbid, What Remains? Is a celebration of life’s messy, beautiful, and deeply human moments. By sharing his grief and the transformative power of embracing death, Callender offers readers a chance to rethink how we face mortality.


This moving, courageous, and uplifting book is a must-read for anyone seeking to demystify death and reimagine how we honour those we lose.


Thank you so much to the author - Rupert Callender, as well as Rosie at Chelsea Green Publishing, for sending me a finished paperback copy of the book!





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